The Boy Who Loved Books

May 14th, 2006

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I was twelve years old when I first fell in love, the quick-burning, star-dazzled kind that hits you suddenly and leaves you dizzy.

It was with a boy I saw after school, a boy who leaned against the railing with its peeling brown paint, unaware of the after-school shrieks and grinding gears of school buses all around him, his eyes never leaving the book he held. I couldn’t see what book it was, but it was a thick book, the long kind with no pictures that only real readers would read.

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Literally Wacky: Mystery Man Update

May 12th, 2006

Well, friends, I’ve done it. I’ve uncovered another clue in our latest literary mystery. I saw the man reading on his porch again: same spot in the book, naturally. So I went home to get my digital camera, hoping to snap his picture and post it here, in case any of our FBI agent readers may recognize him.

Perhaps that would be unethical or even illegal, but really, what do laws matter in the pursuit of truth and justice? Alas, he wasn’t there when I returned. But his book was. Knowing that the identity of the tome could provide crucial evidence, I quickly took a picture, and then ran away in case he was ready to chase after me and torture me for information. Notice that the decrepit-ness of the book would indicate this is an oft-read copy…and note that it is still open to the middle.

 

 

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People, he’s reading The Stand. The Stand. This is significant for two reasons.

  • 1. I was reading the same book just a few days ago! And it’s the same edition. In fact, when I saw the cover, my stomach jumped and the first thought that came to mind was: Has he been in my house? Did he steal it from me? He didn’t, but it was still weird.
  • 2. The most important: this is a book about a virus engineered for world annihilation!! Germ warfare, designed to wipe out most of the earth’s population! Do you see the significance? I think this situation has escalated beyond wacky to truly terrifying.

Please, keep watch over your families. I fear for the future. 
 

Forget finding your muse, let’s find you an agent.

May 10th, 2006

Jeff Herman's Guide To Book Publishers, Editors & Literary Agents, 2006: Who they are! What they want! How to win them over! (Jeff Herman's Guide to Book ... Editors, Publishers, and Literary Agents)

For my inaugural post (hi, I’m Rob), I thought I would roll up my sleeves and share a real nuts and bolts sort of link for those of you who, like myself, might be starting on the road to publication. If you’re already a published author, swell. We’re very proud of you. Now go away and leave us to our desperation.

Last summer, after beginning work on a memoir about my experiences raising an amazing and strange little girl with a rare neurological disorder that keeps her from speaking, I began my search for an agent. I’d read and been told that this was the hardest part, the one that would be filled with sorry and frustration and endless rejection letters. Take heart, friend! You’ll eventually prevail!

Two weeks later, I was signing a contract with a very well-respected literary agent in Manhattan.

Now, I’d love for you to think that it happened because my written proposal was such a stellar piece of literary gold that agents were falling over themselves to represent me. And if you’d like to think that, I’m not going to stop you, because hey, I like being petted.

But deep down, I suspect that the reason I was able to find an agent so quickly had more to do with sending my query letter and/or proposal to the agents whose past work and current projects made them more likely to take on my work. Most agents handle a particular type of work, and if you send your fabulous new Cajun cookbook to an agent who handles murder mysteries and true crime novels, she might steal some of your recipes for her next dinner party, but no matter how much she loves your stuff, she’s not going to represent you.

The best tool I found for targeting those letters and proposals was Jeff Herman’s Guide To Book Publishers, Editors & Literary Agents.

Subtitled “Who they are! What they want! How to win them over!”, Herman’s book gives you not just the names and contact information for agents, publishers and editors. Detailed surveys were sent to agents and editors to fin out not just their backgrounds and past projects, but also their preferred genres, the kinds of authors they like working with and the ones who frustrate them, the things they like to do with their time, and their ratio of accepted to rejected manuscripts. (That number is usually pretty bleak, from 95 to 99 percent refusals.) In other words, the listings give you a pretty good idea of who is likely to appreciate your writing.

The contact information is current and includes which agents will accept proposals from the outset, as opposed to requiring a query letter. Even better, it tells which agents prefer to be contacted by regular mail and which ones like email. The agent I eventually signed with was one I contacted by email. The first piece of paper that passed between us was the contract I signed with her.

Jeff Herman is himself a literary agent, and it shows. He knows the business and has some great advice, in addition to the listings. I can’t recommend his book highly enough. (Note: I was using the 2004 edition, but there is now one for 2006.)

The Secret of the Governess

May 10th, 2006

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One of my biggest regrets in childhood was that I did not have a governess. Yes, I read too many Victorian novels. But really, could I be blamed for turning out such a mess without that faithful role model to guide me with a firm yet kind hand? How could I ever be expected to learn to act like a lady?

If there’s one archetype that rules 19th century literature, it is the governess. She of the tight bun, grim dresses, and unadorned face. The woman so plain, and poor, and alone, that she should’ve been completely overlooked… yet she always manages to ignite passion.

Whether it’s lighting the flames of evil, or the ardor of principles, or the loins of a brooding misanthrope, the governess somehow, even with her mousy ways and hesitant voice, shatters the world around her.  What was the obsession with this character? Is it the sexy librarian syndrome: did we believe that if the governess would just loosen her top button, remove her glasses, and shake her hair free from its restraints, that a lush ripeness would burst forth? Did those very restraints, those covered secret places and corseted curves, represent our desire to break free and shout and run wild?

Whatever the reasons, here’s to the governesses, of yesterday and today. Maybe it’s time to let her free.

Literally Wacky: Mystery Man

May 8th, 2006

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This is one of my favorite categories here, because if literature is filled with one thing, it’s whackjobs. Writers and readers are totally nutters, and we love them for it.

We have a Literally Wacky mystery on our hands, my friends. One we are going to solve. For three days now, as I’ve roamed around my apartment complex for some errand or another, I’ve passed a guy sitting on his porch, reading a book. Not so unusual, except that he’s always staring at the exact same spot in the book. In three days, he hasn’t progressed at all. Well, okay, I know I can’t tell the exact page he’s on, but he has the book open to the middle and he never moves past it. What is the deal? Although I haven’t spied the title of the book, I can tell by the cover colors and yellow-tinged pages that it’s the same one every day.

Also, he has foregone a perfectly comfortable-looking chair on his porch and sits instead on the concrete step, long jean-clad legs splayed out in front of him, directly facing the building across the street. Hmmm. What could this wacky behavior signify? And why isn’t he reading when he’s reading?!

Our options include:

  • He is the slowest reader in the world.
  • He has a favorite dirty part he’s obsessed with.
  • The book is just a front, and really, he’s a voyeur, spying on the girl across the street.
  • He’s just pretending to read to get out of the apartment and escape his screeching harpy of a wife, and is staring at the pages, imagining ways he could murder her and get away with it.
  • I totally need a life.

I will investigate this further until an answer is found. Don’t worry friends, I’m on the case.

Spaceba - Nibbling On Russian

April 29th, 2006

So what about this whole thing on foreign novels? I mean, aren’t most of the classics written in a language other than English? No one, bar no one, is more grateful for translations than I am. Without them, we wouldn’t have much of the greatest literature available to us. But wouldn’t it be fun to read a book in the original tongue?

I once spoke Russian. I learned in high school and of course since that was a million years ago and I have since lost all of my stone tablets the lessons were chiseled into, I have forgotten it. I don’t exactly live somewhere where you hear the language. And if you don’t use it, you do lose it.

BUT, you can get it back!! I found a great podcast that is going to do just that for me. And I have every intention of reading some Russian literature. My long term goal? Why, War and Peace, of course!!

A Spoonful of Russian - One Bite at a Time

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Writing Is A Solitary Job… Or Is It?

April 26th, 2006

It may not be if the “Million Author Project” has its way. Their goal is to create various manuscripts contributed to by as many people as possible. Hence, “million authors.” It isn’t difficult; the rules are simple and you can contribute as little as a sentence.

From the site: “The Million Authors Project is an experiment to test the collective minds of several thousand people, all working together to create a written work. The goal of the project is to end up with a written novel, novella or short story for everyone to enjoy, written one page, paragraph, or sentence at a time.”

While you are there visiting the site, check out The Million Authors Projectthe FAQs - that will provide a lot of the information you might need. The documents (in pdf) explain the rest. And click on goodies - you can get wallpapers and buttons for your own blog or Web site.

They say the written word makes the writer immortal. Why not take a slice of that immortality for yourself? Better yet, see how you can work together in the human community to create a truly interesting work of fiction or non-fiction.

Million Author Project

Million Authors FAQs

Million Author Goodies

A Book Club of Your Choice

April 23rd, 2006

Barnes Noble has a neat idea for a book club.  They have, within their University online, a selection of books that are being read and discussed each month.  May is approaching quickly.  It is a perfect time to select a book and get involved in discussing it with others.  There is quite a variety to chose from and it won’t cost you anything (except the cost of the book of course, but there is always the library!)

Barnes Noble Book Clubs

For Earth Day 2006 - Henry David Thoreau & Walden

April 21st, 2006

When I realized it was Earth Day (April 22, 2006), my thoughts immediately went to Henry David Thoreau who, “… went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.”

Thoreau understood all about Earth Day before we had to have a “holiday” claimed for it. He understood about simplicity and living deliberately. And now we read about how to do just that which, at one time, came so naturally.

If you have never read Thoreau’s Walden, don’t wait. It is a book that everyone should read and waste no time in doing so.

Walden - Online


NPR - Walden


Walden Woods Project


Walden Pond State Reservation

Start Your Own Book Club

April 20th, 2006

Book clubs are all over the place right now. They are sponsored by private individuals, bookstores, schools, churches, and are even online. If you love to read, you have probably considered joining a book club.

But what if you live somewhere where there isn’t an existing club? Don’t despair. You can still belong to a book club. You will just have to start it yourself. And don’t panic and run the opposite direction.

This easy guide will get you going so you can start your own book club. The two books below will complete your “training,” and make the experience a rich and rewarding one.

Remember to have fun with your new club. It will take some time for the club to find its pace, but that’s okay. Just enjoy it and let it mature at its own rate. You will get back much more than you ever put into your club.

How To Start Your Own Book Club

Book Club Journal: A Workbook and Record Keeper

The Reading Group Handbook : Everything You Need to Know, from Choosing Membersto Leading Discussions